I think we deserve a better love story

which means that when I write about us, about our downfall, I often take a few liberties.

It would be too cliche to write about two people who always look at each other with longing, but never do anything about it besides ache. I still write the most honest parts down; that you were here and then you weren’t. that you looked at me like potential instead of permanence; that I looked at you like a promise instead of a possibility.

Yet, if there is one thing I know about poetry, it’s that, sometimes, you have to bend the truth a little. So I write about what could’ve been; the nights spent growing closer and falling in love instead of falling apart. With us, it never felt there was much of a difference. Or how when I stayed the night, you were more at home with me than you ever were in that house; I can make a metaphor out of anything if you’re not careful I write about what would have happened if, when you said “someday it’s going to be us”, you actually meant it for more than that fleeting moment.

I write about it so much that I’m not sure what the truth is anymore. Whether these feelings I have carried in your name were actually meant for you or for everything I hoped we might be. I know you’ve always told me who you were since the beginning, but I just couldn’t bear to write any of that down.