we accept the love we think we deserve
In the labyrinthine corridors of my mind, I find myself entangled in a paradoxical dance with love. A kaleidoscope of emotions swirls within, each hue weaving tales of longing, fear, and self-doubt. And amid this emotional symphony, a poignant quote resonates like a whispered echo, “we accept the love we think we deserve.”
In the quiet recesses of my soul, I grapple with shadows that linger from wounds of yesteryears. Love, like a tender sapling, once bloomed brightly in the garden of my heart, only to be trampled by careless feet, leaving behind the debris of broken trust and shattered dreams. These wounds run deep, etching scars upon my heart’s canvas, coloring every subsequent encounter with love.
In the alchemy of self-perception, a belief took root, that I am a vessel of imperfection, unworthy of the love others may offer. And so, I built fortresses around my heart, walls impenetrable, shields raised to keep love at bay. The fear of hurting those who dare draw close becomes a relentless sentinel, warding off potential pain, like an anguished guardian of my own affection.
But in my desire to protect, I pushed away hands that reached for mine, turned away souls that sought solace in the warmth of my embrace. And as I stood amid the ruins of broken connections, I pondered why I consistently turned love away. Was it because I feared inflicting the pain I knew so well, or was it the belief that I am undeserving of such profound tenderness?
A cycle of hurt perpetuates when we normalize the agony, a slow descent into a self-fulfilling prophecy. “Deserve” — a word heavy with connotations, a verdict passed upon oneself, a cruel and biased judgment. But what if, beneath the layers of insecurity, lay the forgotten truth that love is not earned, but simply embraced?
I yearn to break free from this self-inflicted spell, to unlearn the notions that tether my heart to an unworthy narrative. For in the vast expanse of the universe, love knows no prejudice; it finds us in the midst of our brokenness, accepting us with all our jagged edges and insecurities.
I shall rise above the shadows, daring to believe that I am not destined to repeat the history of hurt. The tapestry of my life can be woven with threads of love, kindness, and compassion. And as I cast aside the chains of self-doubt, I will open my heart to the possibility that I am worthy of love’s gentle caress.
For in the end, we are all flawed travelers on this journey of existence, seeking solace in the connections we forge. And though scars may mark our paths, love remains the beacon that illuminates our way, guiding us toward the embrace we truly deserve.
